Crying never seems to help...


'~' I take all this pain...I put it in rhymes...Then you get the chance for the very first time. You get to feel the pain...there's stuff inside me...like all this hate...I don't know if I can handle...I don't know if I can carry this weight...I just wanna let go...I just wanna be free...it's time for all this hate...to finally leave me...

'~' You don't understand me and you never will. So don't start that shit 'bout knowin' how I feel.

'~' My life is full of empty promises and broken dreams. I'm hoping things will look up, and right when they do, there's always something to fuck it up, and we're back at square one.

'~' Do you know what it's like to be me? Go through something not everyone can see? Do you know what it's like to walk in my shoes? Please stop judging me simply cause I'm not you...

'~' Things are going crazy and I'm not sure who to blame. Everything is changing and I don't feel the same. I'm slipping through the cracks of floors I thought were strong. I'm trying to find a place where I feel like I belong.

'~' I think I'd do better on my own, no friends, no fights,just me...alone

'~' I fuckin hate this life. Sometimes I think it would be easier just to get a knife. I don't know what to do, I'm cryin every night. It would just be easier if I was outta sight.

'~' I'm tired of trying. I'm tired of crying. I know I've been smiling, but inside I'm dying.

'~' Give me a reason to keep believing that everything isn't misleading and kiss the clouds on the rainy days and smile for you when skies are gray. Cause I'm a tear drop away from crying and a few breaths away from dying.

'~' Maybe if I wasn't so good at pretending to be happy, I might learn to actually be happy.

'~' I just want a day to go by...when I'm not pretending to be happy.

'~' I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to kill the things on the inside. '

~' Why do I try not to cry, sometimes I think I could die. But when it comes out, I just want to shout, and scream and cry it all out.

'~' People think she's so strong...because she [pretends] nothing is wrong.

'~' Behind this innocent smile of mine, lay words that go unsaid. Words of longing, love, anger, and hate, all repeating inside my head.

'~' Tears have come and tears have gone. My emotional torment still lives on. The scars right here upon my wrist, are what have helped me get through this.

'~' Have you ever just wanted to die...kill yourself and forget how you tried?

'~' Don't be fooled by her smile, inside she's breaking...

'~' I just wanna end it all. Should I trip or should I fall. Will someone be there to catch me when I'm falling to the ground, or will I be there forever lying there with no sound.

'~' Do you ever just get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody. You don't want to smile and you don't want to fake being happy but at the same time you don't know exactly what is wrong either?

'~' A strong girl keeps her stuff in line-and with tears running she still manages to spit the simple words "I'm fine."


~A

Life is a prison, Oh Buddha let me out.
No one to listen, To hear when you shout.
Climb the walls of insanity,
Ride the waves of despair.
If you fall it don't matter,
There's no one to care.
Used to wish for a window,
To see birds, trees and sky,
But you're better without one -
Stops you aiming too high.
Watching freedom is painful,
For those locked away.
Seeing joy, love and happiness,
Another price that you pay.
Strong is good, weak is bad.
Be it false, be it true.
Your mind makes the choice,
And enforces it too.
Cell walls built by society,
With rules to adhere.
If you breach the acceptable,
You had better beware.
Hide the pain, carry on.
Routine is the key.
Don't let on that you're not,
what you're pretending to be.
Lock it all up inside you,
How badly that bodes.
Look out for that one day,
When it all just explodes.
Leaving naught but a shell.
Base functionality too.
But killing all else,
That was uniquely you.
So how do you grow,
With a time bomb inside?
Or how to defuse it,


.....Without destroying its ride? You can't.


~A

"There are seconds, they come only five or six at a time, and you suddenly feel the presence of eternal harmony, fully achieved. It is nothing earthly; not that it's heavenly, but man cannot endure it in his earthly state. One must change physically or die." ~Fyodor Dostoevsky


Sometimes our dark and tormented soul
is like a helium balloon
trying to float away from this world...


WHY IS THAT WHEN YOU FORGET WHAT YOU WERE GONNA SAY... YOU STILL REMEMBER YOU WERE GONNA SAY SOMETHING???



"Where ever you are, be there totally." ~ Eckhart Tolle ~



"Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin." ~ Mother Theresa ~


There is nothing wrong with following in someones foot step's as long as you leave your own foot step's behind!


ENCOURAGING WORDS I WILL BE KEEPING IN MIND

Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now.

Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now.

What you think of as the past is a memory trace, stored in the mind, of a former Now. When you remember the past, you reactivate a memory trace - and you do so in the Now. The future is an imagined Now, a projection of the mind. When the future comes, it comes in the Now. When you think about the future, you do it in the Now. Past and future obviously have no reality of thier own. Just as the moon has no light of its own, but can only reflect the light of the sun, so are past and future only pale reflections of the light, power, and reality of the eternal present. Thier reality is "borrowed" from the Now.

The essence of what I am saying here cannot be understood by the mind. The moment you grasp it, there is a shift in consciousness from mind to being, from time to presence.
Suddenly, everything feels alive, radiates energy, emanates Being.